בלוג

Caption contest

2008-11-10T18:47:10Z

(I took the photos on the right. The one on the left is stock footage, from the Internet.)

What caption would you give this?

This morning's sermon

2008-09-13T20:11:15Z

I started off by saying that i remember when i was a child that they opened a new grocery store in **** with a chidush -- things being sold in bulk -- large bins of candies or pasta or other things which you could take as much of as you wanted, put in a bag, and weigh, and then pay for when you left...
Then i came to israel and things were also being sold in bulk, except there was a big sign over the stuff saying "don't eat before you pay", which i thought was funny, at first, until i saw people doing just that...
And then i learned that if you were hungry in the morning, you could go to the shuk and get a whole breakfast for free, by starting at one end and walking the length of the shuk taking a nut here, a cookie there, a grape there... by the time you got to the end, you were full (I've NEVER actually done that... but others do)
Then i mentioned that once i was in a supermarket in jerusalem and saw a certain charedi rav -- someone quite well respected in certain circles -- standing in line at the checkout, eating from an opened bag of bamba, and that really bugged me, so i walked up to him and asked him if he didn't think that maybe he should pay for that before he starts eating it... He hemmed and hawed, embarrassed.

Then i tied all this into the parsha -- because it says in the parsha that when you come into your friend's vinyard, you may eat as many grapes as you want to fill your hunger, but you may not put any in your vessels.
Which seems like a very strange concept -- mah pit'om that i could eat someone else's grapes off their vines without their permission? But the talmud explains that it's only referring to a worker who's been hired to harvest the grapes -- the worker is allowed to eat grapes as s/he goes along, but not to take any home without permission.
And then I talked about fair workers' conditions and civil justice issues, not returning a slave to his/her home country, refugees seeking asylum, and stuff like that.

My congregants loved it. Which is good. :)

Shavua tov.

Why the big smiley face on the front wall inside the funeral chapel at Bet Shemesh?

2008-01-09T18:46:32Z

I was at a funeral at the Bet Shemesh cemetary ("Eretz HaChaim") this week on Monday.

I really don't know how the decorator could've been so dumb. What a stupidly inappropriate way to decorate the room.

The front wall in the inside of the funeral chapel in Bet Shemesh, i.e where everyone faces during the eulogies, behind where the body is put, has this large smiley face. Probably not put there intentionally, but you can't miss it. There are two small rectangular windows near the ceiling. Below them, smack in between, there's an oval shaped light fixture -- the only one on that wall. and then below that, there's a pasuk written in a large semicircle (the bottom half of a circle). So it's an unmistakable smiley face.

Why would they do that?

is this "immaculate conception" in Philo???

2007-12-10T19:29:20Z

Found this. It's in Philo's Allegorical Interpretation, book III:

LXIII. (179) And he uttered this prayer, blaming Joseph the statesman and governor, because he had ventured to say, "I will feed them in that Land,"{87}{#ge 45:11.} for, "hasten ye," said Joseph, "and go up to my father, and say unto him, Thus says Joseph," and so on, and presently he adds, "Come down unto me, and do not tarry, come with all thou hast, and I will feed thee in that land; for still the famine lasts for five years." Jacob, therefore, speaks as he does reproving and at the same time instructing this imaginary wise man, and he says to him, "O my friend, know thou that the food of the soul is knowledge, which it is not the word which is intelligible by the external senses that can bestow, but God only who has nourished me from youth, and from my earliest age till the time of perfect manhood, he shall fill me with it. (180) Joseph therefore was treated in the same way with his mother Rachel, for she also thought that the creature had some power; on which account she used the expression, "Give me children," but the supplanter [=Jacob (HCY)], adhering to his proper character, says to her, "You have used a great error; for I am not in the peace of God, who alone is able to open the womb of the soul, {88}{#ge 30:1.} and to implant virtues in it, and to cause it to be pregnant, and to bring forth what is good. Consider also the history of thy sister Leah, and you will find that she did not receive seed or fertility from any creature--but from God himself." "For the Lord, seeing that Leah was hated, opened her womb, but Rachel was Barren."{89}{#ge 29:31.} (181) And consider, now, in this sentence, again, the subtlety of the writer spoken of. God opens the wombs, implanting good actions in them, and the womb, when it has received virtue from God, does not bring forth to God, for the living and true God is not in need of any thing, but she brings forth sons to me, Jacob, for it was for my sake, probably, that God sowed seen in virtue, and not for his own. Therefore, another husband of Leah is found to be passed over in silence, and another father of Leah's children, for he is the husband who openeth the womb, and he is the father of the children to whom the mother is said to bear them.

(Translation taken from http://www.earlychristianwritings.com/yonge/book4.html)

My thought: Wow!

joke i heard on shabbat

2007-11-25T07:24:44Z

Ahmenajad calls up Bush and says to him, "Bush, I had a dream last night. And in my dream, I saw an airplane flying over the United States, with a banner that read, 'United States of Iran'!"

Bush says, "Funny you should call me, because I, too, had a dream last night. And in my dream, I also saw an airplane with a banner, flying over Iran!"

Ahmenajad says, "What did the banner say?"

Bush says, "I don't know, I can't read Hebrew!"

Video (in two parts) -- how to make a culmus

2007-11-11T23:42:51Z

My friend shows me how he makes his culmus.

Part 1:

Part 2:

they'll never get these right

2007-11-11T10:54:39Z

In this week's episode of ER. (Season 14 Episode 7).
Why can't they ever get these right? Why do they even try? Does it make you feel good to see bad attempts of Jewish people in TV programs?

Do it yourself circumcision kit

2007-11-10T23:30:20Z

Only in an Israeli drugstore will you find one of these next to the condoms, the sanitary napkins, the home pregnancy tests and the bedikah cloths. Too bad they didn't have them yet when my sons were born.





	Special offer: Have your son's magen cleaned and sterilized, and then have his name engraved on it, with the date of his bris.
There's no video cassette inside this box.

You'd think it would come with sterile, disposable press-on thumbnails! I mean, if women can wear them, why not mohalim?

Hooters in Meah Shearim?

2007-11-08T17:59:48Z

http://www.israeltoday.co.il/default.aspx?tabid=178&nid=12012

"Ahiraz believes Hooters would survive, following the failure of Hard Rock Café and Planet Hollywood, because Hooters plans on opening a chain of restaurants, hopefully also in Jerusalem, Eilat and Haifa.

“I don't think there will be a backlash against the restaurant,” Ahiraz said. "

LOL!

Hooters, Meah Shearim branch. :)

:)

2007-11-08T05:59:02Z

Lovely example of the Torah of the Acharonim

2007-10-31T18:46:40Z

For this week's parashah, there's a great example of the way Acharonim come up with great ways of twisting the meaning of Midrashim and older perushim to make them fit with their religious outlook, which obviously to us (but not to them) wasn't shared by the old ones.

This is from the anonymous commentary in the "Chumash Rav Peninim", right at the beginning of Parashat Chayei Sarah.

‫‫ויהיו חיי שרה וגו'. פי' רש"י ז"ל, ונסמכה מיתת שרה לעקדת יצחק, לפי שע"י בשורת העקדה שנזדמן בנה לשחיטה וכמעט שלא נשחט פרחה נשמתה.

‫וקשה והלא אברהם היה טפל בנביאות לשרה ואיך לא עמדה בנסיון? ועוד שהיה לו לרש"י ז"ל לכתוב וכמעט שנשחט פרחה נשמתה. כי עבור השחיטה פרחה נשמתה, לא על שלא נשחט.

‫‫ויוכל היות שכונת המאמר הזה הוא להיפך. ששרה שמעה בשורת העקדה והיתה לה שמחה גדולה. ומיד אח"ז שמעה שנשחט תמורתו איל, ונתעצבה מאד כי שמא נמצא איזה פסול ביצחק שאיננו ראוי להקרבה. ושאלה אם יש עכ"פ איזה חבלה בגופו להיות עכ"פ התחלה במצוה גדולה זו, גם יהיה לזכרון תמיד לפני ה', והטפת דם קרבן זה יהיה לרצון כאלו כל דמו נזרק. וכיון ששמעה "כמעט לא נשחט" פי' אפי' מעט לא נשחט ואפי' טפת דם אחת לא יצא מיצחק, אז אמרה הרי ברור הוא שיצחק לא נרצה לה' לקרבן. או שאין אני או בעלי זכאים בעיני ה' שיקבל ממנו קרבן כזה. והעיקר תלתה החטא בה בעצמה שהיא אינה כדאי לזה. ומרוב צערה מתה.

"And these were the lives of Sarah, etc. Rashi o.b.m. explains, why does the death of Sarah follow the binding of Isaac? Because the news of the binding, that her son was given for slaughter and almost didn't get slaughtered, her soul flew away.

This is difficult, for Abraham was lesser than Sarah in prophecy, so why didn't she survive the trial? And also, Rashi should have written that he was almost slaguhtered, not that he was almost *not* slaughtered, for it's because of the slaughtering that her soul left her body, not because he *wasn't* slaughtered.

It's possible that the intention of this commentary is the opposite. When Sarah heard the news of the binding, she had great joy. And immediately afterwards she heard that a ram was slaughtered in his place, and she became very sad, worrying that perhaps something unfit had been found in Isaac and therefore he wasn't worthy of being sacrificed. And she asked if, at least, *some* type of damage had been done to his body, so that there would have been at least a *beginning* of this great mitzvah, and that too would be an everlasting memory before God, and spilling some of his blood might be considered by God as if all his blood was spilled. But when she heard that "he almost wasn't slaughtered", meaning that even a little bit wasn't slaughtered, not even a drop of blood left Isaac, she said that it is clear that Isaac wasn't desired by God for a sacrifice. Or perhaps I or my husband are not worthy enough in God's eyes for Him to receive a sacrifice like this from us. But for the most part, she blamed her own sin for making her unworthy, and due to her great pain, she died.

I'll just add that a lot of this commentary is based on a misunderstand of the language style of the time. Double negatives are used differently in Hebrew, and are even proper to be used in modern Hebrew. For instance, you say,

אני לא אעשה את זה עד שלא תביא לי אותו

Verbatim translated, "I will not do this until you don't bring me that", but it actually means that I won't do it until you DO bring me that. Just the way Hebrew works differently than Western languages.

It is clear that Rashi means "he was almost slaughtered" (or "he was almost, but not slaughtered") by כמעט שלא נשחט.

Furthermore, it is clear that Rashi is not making this idea up, but basing it on a Midrash that appears in the Tanchuma and in Kohelet Rabbah, which says:

The Satan went to Sarah and appeared to her in the image of Isaac. When she saw him, she said, "My son, what did your father do to you?" He said to her, "My father took me over hills and through valleys until he took me up to the top of a tall, steep mountain, built an altar, arranged the wood, bound me on the altar, and took hold of a knife to slaughter me. And had not the Holy One, blessed be He, said to him "Do not send your hand", I would be slaughtered by now." He did not succeed in finishing telling her all this before her soul left her body."

Here it's pretty clear that Sarah's death is connected to the possibility of her son being slaughtered, no? I guess in a stretch, you *could* try to read it the way that Rav Peninim did, but clearly that's not what's meant.

But how is it possible that a righteous woman like Sarah would NOT want her son sacrificed to God, right?

Another error being made by this commentary is mixing up of midrashim. Traditional Achronim, and most modern-day Ortho scholars, like to see all the midrashim, all the commentaries, all the authorities, as agreeing on everything, so if there seems to be a contradiction, a way of explaining it must be found. Just saying that they disagree doesn't work. But clearly that is wrong. The midrashim don't all fit together. The fact that in one place God tells Avraham to listen to everything Sarah tells him, and the midrash learns from there that Sarah was greater than Avraham in prophecy, doesn't mean that the author of *this* midrash thinks of Sarah that way, too! The author of *this* midrash is perfectly legitimate in seeing Sarah as someowhat lesser in her dedication, or let's not even call it that, let's just say she was human, and that the thought of her son being killed was enough to give her a heart attack. So the question, again, is just wrong.

two shocking things

2007-10-24T20:50:49Z

I was in an "Everything for two shekels" store yesterday. I noticed that they were selling a peculiar little device. It looked kind of like a hearing aid, and it was advertised as a "cure" for tiredness, driving while sleepy, or drunk driving. I read the details. It was a device that, once turned on, would start to beep if the wearer's head began to droop. So, a drunk person who started falling asleep at the wheel would be woken up as soon as s/he fell asleep and his or her head started to droop. Isn't that horrible?
I was in a department store. Two small boys, probably around six years old, walked by. One of the boys said quite loudly, to his friend, but heard by all: "I'd like to f%#k that woman." ("בא לי לזיין את האשה הזאת") Six years old! What is this world coming to? (And I think he was referring to a skimpily-dressed womannequin.)

Hmmmmm

2007-10-21T00:00:26Z

Sneak peek at my sukkah

2007-09-26T07:05:38Z

Here's a sneak peek of my sukkah. Photo taken from my mirpeset (balcony). It's just about ready. The Chazon Ish wouldn't like it because there's metal in it, but it meets the rest of the opinions' expectations. Lavud straps around the sides so no need to rely on the flimsy flappy tarps for dubious walls, schach is nice and thick enough, and resting on wooden beams, not resting on the metal bars.

Left to do: Put down the carpet, put in the electricity, and bring in the furniture. These, I'll do this afternoon. After dinner tonight, after collapsing the table, I'll also bring in the bed.

Ah, sleeping under the stars. Gotta love it.

Sukkot are supposed to remind us of the Clouds of Glory which God put over us to protect us in the desert. I doubt they had metal bars and plastic tarps, though. Well, halakhah is halakhah.

In today's Yediot Acharonot newspaper

2007-09-19T19:28:11Z

I saw this in today's Yediot Acharonot newspaper!

Translation:

The blessings [to be said] when seeing
The king messiah
The Lubavitcher Rebbe
He is the god
There is none other than him!

(From the responsa Lev Chaim part 2 chapter 42)
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, redeemer of Israel.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who let us live, and sustained us, and brought us to this time.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who gave of His wisdom to those who fear Him.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, who gave of His honour to those who fear Him.
Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the universe, wise One of the secrets.

May our master, teacher, and ruler, king messiah, live forever!

It is possible to pray to the Lubavitcher Rebbe, the Holy One blessed be He
And it is desirable to travel to the Messiah's house, 770, in Brooklyn
Which is actually the third temple.

Meir Menachem Barnes, spokesman for the Messiah
050-8531446

Proper direction for praying, in a shul where the Holy Ark is placed on the wrong wall

2007-09-19T15:01:54Z

Since this came up when replying to hatam_soferet's blog, I thought I'd crosspost it here for my readers' benefit as well.

Often times, shuls (especially non-Orthodox ones. Orthodox ones are usually much more careful about this) are built with the Aron HaKodesh (Holy Ark) *not* on the wall that's in the direction of Jerusalem. Usually, nowadays, shuls like this have the congregants stand facing the Aron HaKodesh anyway. But that's not really proper. Here are the sources:

Ba'er Hetev on Orach Chayyim 94:2, se`if kattan 3, 4:

A synagogue in which the Holy Ark was placed on the South side and everyone prays towards the Holy Ark which is on the South side, he may pray towards the East side even though the entire congregation is praying Southward, and there is not a problem of haughtiness or angering [the congregation] by doing so. [Source:] Yad Eliyahu paragraph 1. But one great one disagrees with him, [maintaining that] instead he should pray in the direction that the congregation is praying, see there... In the [book] Kenesset HaGedolah it is written that even if the Ark is set at a different side, he must turn his face to the East.

בית כנסת שהעמידו בו את ארון הקודש לצד דרום של העולם וכולם מתפללין נגד הארון הקודש שהוא לצד דרום, יוכל להתפלל לצד מזרח אף שכל הקהל מתפללים נגד דרום ואין כאן משום יוהרא ולא משום איבה. יד אליהו סי' א'. וגדול אחד שם חולק עליו רק יתפלל לצד שהציבור מתפללין, עיין שם... וכתב בכנסת הגדולה אפילו הארון קבוע לרוח אחרת צריך להחזיר פניו למזרח.

Mishnah Berurah 94:9,10 :

And since one must pray towards the East, it is customary to set the Ark in which the Torah Scroll is kept on the Eastern wall. If it is impossible to set it on the Eastern wall, one should set it in the South, and in any case not in the West which would cause the backs of the congregation to be towards the Ark. However, even if the Ark was set on a different wall, the one praying should face East... A synagogue in which they set the Ark in the Southern wall, and everyone prays towards the Ark which is in the South, even though it is improper, as was mentioned before in paragraph 9, even so, someone who comes to pray there should pray in the direction that the congregation is praying, but should turn his/her face towards the East.

ולפי שצריך להתפלל לצד מזרח נהגו לקבוע ההיכל שספר התורה בתוכו בכותל מזרחי, ואם אי-אפשר לו לקבוע במזרח יקבע בדרום ועל-כל-פנים לא למערב שיהיה אחורי העם להיכל, ומיהו אפילו קבעו ההיכל בכותל אחר צריך המתפלל להחזיר פניו למזרח... בית כנסת שהעמידו בו את ארון הקודש לצד דרום העולם וכולם מתפללים נגד ארון הקודש שהוא לצד דרום, אף שהוא שלא כהוגן וכנזכר לעיל בסעיף-קטן ט', מכל-מקום הבא להתפלל שם יתפלל לצד שהצבור מתפללין אך יצדד פניו למזרח.

Arukh HaShulchan, Orach Chayyim 94:12,13 :

The Holy Ark should be installed in the East, but even if it was installed in a different side, even so they should pray towards the East. And therefore, they should be careful not to install it in the West, because then their backs will be towards the Ark... If the Holy Ark is standing at the Northern or Southern side and the entire congregation is praying towards that side, and one person wants to pray towards the East, he/she should not do so, for if so they will not all be bowing in the same direction and it looks like "two authorities". Rather, one should pray in the direction that the congregation is praying and turn him/herself slightly towards East. However, if he/she is praying there alone, not at the time when the congregation is praying, he may pray facing the Eastern wall, for then it doesn't appear like "two authorities".

הארון הקודש קובעים במזרח, ואפילו קבעוהו בצד אחר מכל-מקום יתפללו למזרח. ולכן יזהרו שלא לקובעו במערב, דאם-כן יהיה אחוריהם אל ההיכל... אם ארון הקודש עומד לצד צפון או לצד דרום וכל הציבור מתפללים לאותו צד, ואחד רוצה להתפלל למזרח, לא יעשה כן, דאם כן לא ישתחוו כולם לצד אחד ומיחזי כשתי רשויות, אלא יתפלל לצד שהצבור מתפללין ויצדד עצמו קצת למזרח. אך אם הוא מתפלל לבדו שם שלא בשעה שהציבור מתפללין, יכול להתפלל כנגד כותל מזרח דאז לא מיחזי כשתי רשויות.

I wonder how this phenomenon of facing the Ark even if it's on the wrong side began. Was it just due to ignorance -- people assuming that they should be praying towards the Ark? Or was there once another opinion out there that has been lost/forgotten? My guess is that it's the first, but if you can find me an opinion that says otherwise, please let me know.

In any case, bottom line is that in a Shul where the Ark is on the wrong side, people should still pray in the direction of Jerusalem. If nobody's doing so, though, an individual needs to pray in the same direction everyone else is, but can turn slightly, or turn his/her face towards the right direction (unless it's behind him/her!). If one works in that synagogue and goes into the sanctuary to pray minchah etc. on his/her own, without a minyan, then they should pray while facing the correct direction, not the direction of the Ark.

Can I see what your shul's sanctuary looks like?

2007-09-19T08:26:03Z

I'm curious to see what kinds of shuls you guys go to. How is the sanctuary set up? Which way do the leaders face? Where do they sit? Bimah in center of the room? At front? Chazzan's amud and/or table for Torah reading centered before the Ark, or rabbi's and cantor's lecturns side-by-side at opposite ends of the stage? Separate (side by side with/without mechitza, or balcony) or mixed seating? Does the sanctuary face the correct direction (Ark on the wall that's in direction of Jerusalem? If not, do people pray facing the Ark or facing Jerusalem?)? Etc. etc. IF you can, please post a photo or two. You could link to a photo from your shul's website, or better yet display it inline in your comment by typing

<img src=http://link_to_the_photo.jpg>

in your comment. Also, mention what you like about the setup, what you don't like, how you feel about it, etc. etc.

Also, what are the services like? What siddur is used? Is stuff skipped? Is stuff said in English? Lots or a little? Full chazarah or hoicha kedusha? Duchaning? Egalitarian? If so, how much? Is there a choir? Is there a professional cantor or are services lay-led? Are there musical instruments (what kind? built-in pipe organ?)?

And what movement is your shul affiliated with?

Thanks!

(If you're reading this on my facebook, please go to my livejournal blog and post your response there so that all the responses are in one place. http://reb-hillel.livejournal.com . Thanks)

Video: How to blow a shofar

2007-09-11T17:37:55Z

reb_hillel @ 2007-09-11T19:28:00

2007-09-11T17:36:57Z

I don't really have time to post to my blog now. I'm such a procrastinator. But I thought I'd tell these two stories.

Out in the middle of nowhere, in Yaffo

Yesterday (Monday) I traveled to Yaffo to a shofar factory, hoping they could fix/refurbish/clean mine so that it would sound better, and if not, buy a new, reasonably priced one. The shofar factory was out in the middle of nowhere in old Yaffo, a small yucky building in the middle of nowhere. When I finally got there, I saw a building with a picture of a man blowing a Shofar on the side, so I knew it was the right place. Since it was a kinda cool place and building, I took a picture. Immediately thereafter two guys ran up to me and yelled at me for taking a picture, saying it was against the rules. I asked why, and they just said, it's against the rules! Weird. They wouldn't let me close to the factory entrance, but rather showed me to another door, which was bolted closed, where I had to wait for them to open it and let me in...

Once inside, they bolted the door behind me. They were very careful to always unlock it to let someone in or out but lock it immediately thereafter. That was weird.

After telling me there was no way to clean or fix *my* shofarot, they pointed to a box of shofarot on the floor, and I started looking for one I liked. When I found one I thought might be okay, I asked how much. The guy said four-hundred dollars. I was shocked, and said, "Are you crazy? I'm not paying that much!" So they showed me some boxes of smaller ones (minimal length of a shofar to be kosher is one tefach -- 8 cm). I looked around until I found one that blew nicely, and asked how much that one was -- and it was below the amount I expected to pay. So I asked to see one that was one step up -- for comparison, and they pointed back to the first box. I said, "but you said those were 400 dollars!" The guy said he had been joking with me. I pulled another one out that looked nice and blew OK, and he gave me the price -- slightly more than the small one I'd found, but definitely within my price range. In the end, though, I decided that the cheaper one sounded better, so I decided to go with that.

The shofar factory

After the guy took my money, made change, and wrapped it in a bag, I asked him if they manufacture them right there. He said yes. I asked if they were manufacturing any right at that moment, he said yes. I asked if I could maybe take some pictures so I could show my children how it's done. He looked at me like I was crazy and said "Chas Vechalilah" (i.e., God forbid)! Surprised, I asked why not. He said they don't let anyone take pictures. I asked if they ever do tours -- and again he said "Chas Vechalilah" with great disdain. I guess they must be guarding some sort of family secret?

Anyway, kinda surprised, I rode back to Jerusalem with my new, nice shofar.

That's story #1. Here's story #2:

I need to bring a Sefer Torah with me to the kibbutz where I'm going for Rosh Hashanah. In the end, I was offered two -- one by the shul where I read Parashat Ki Tavo (not the one with the vowels, a decent sefer), and the other, by the yeshiva where I teach. I decided to take the yeshiva's, since, from memory, it's written better than the shul's. I went this morning to pick it up and decided that I'd roll it to the correct place, in Bereshit, right there, so that if I happened to come across a problem, I'd be able to take the other sefer with me instead.

I was just rolling, though. I wasn't looking for a problem. A sefer Torah, after all, has "chezkat kashrut" (you assume it's kosher unless it's proven otherwise -- it's unnecessary to check it for no reason). I merely intended to look over the part I'd be reading from on Rosh HaShanah.

But, it happened. As I was rolling from BaMidbar to Bereshit, a big problem jumped right out at me from the klaf. There was a crease in the klaf, and where the crease was, letters were erased. There was a dalet there that was mostly erased. Undeniably passul -- unfit to be read from.

At first, the guy who offered it to me, suggested I take it anyway as is, and they'll fix it some time next week. I told him, though, that I couldn't read from it like that, and that I'd take the shul's sefer instead. Then, to cover my tuchus, I said, let's show it to the Rosh Yeshiva. I knew he'd concur with me, but that'd be a good thing -- that way the yeshiva wouldn't look at me as some chanyak making problems for them. He, of course, agreed with me that it needed fixing and couldn't be used like that.

The first rabbi suggested that I fix it with a Pilot felt pen. Once, I *was* advised to use a Pilot pen to fix a sefer Torah, when it was a desperate need -- there is an opinion that the ink doesn't have to be made especially for a Sefer Torah, but any black ink from a synthetic or vegetable source is OK (citation needed). However, just to make sure, I called up a friend of mine, who asked a posek, who said that although some permit it, it's better not to (citation needed). My friend's sofer friend offered to fix it for me tonight, if I brought it to him, but I thought that would be too much trouble on the night before my trip. So I said I'd just take the shul's sefer, and some time next week I'd work on fixing this one. The yeshiva people agreed to that.

My Sefer-Torah fixing kit.
Note the plastic fake quill tip beside the uncarved feather.
It slips over the end of the feather and writes really well.

Then I called up the rabbi of the shul to ask when he'd be there, so I could get his Sefer Torah from him. I'd have to wait two hours for him to show up. Since I'd have to wait around anyway, I decided to walk over to "Kesset" in Me'ah She'arim and buy the necessary equipment to just fix the yeshiva's Sefer Torah, myself. I found the store, somewhere in the kishkes of Me'ah She'arim, bought the coolest "slip-on" plastic quill end (it's like a sofer's version of press-on nails),* and some ink, and brought that back to the yeshiva.

Instead of fixing it immediately, I decided to wait an hour so that the students could watch and learn something. The rabbi who was lending me the S"T took some nice photos -- I asked him to email me copies, but he hasn't yet. (I'll post 'em when I get 'em.) When it dried, I rolled to Bereshit, read through the R"H reading, fixed a couple of things that were borderline problematic, packed it up, and brought it home.

That rabbi said he'd like to hire me to give some hands on presentations about safrut, which will be nice. Also, he thinks he'll pay me to go through the S"T with the vowels and fix it. Yay! Money!

* Normal sofrim carve their own quills out of feathers, but to do so takes lots of practice. Halakhically, it doesn't matter what you use to write with anyway, so plastic is just fine. You could just use the plastic tip thing without a feather, but it would be kinda harder to hold. Instead of a feather, it could be slipped onto the end of a pen or pencil just as well. The feather also looks more impressive, though.

Another thought on עקידת יצחק -- the Binding of Isaac

2007-09-09T16:38:53Z

Whenever I think about the Biblical story of the Binding of Isaac (which happens every year around Rosh HaShanah, as well as when we read Parashat Vayera, among other times), I think back to when I was in Grade 3 (Third Grade, for you Americans).

No, my father didn't drag me out of the house early one morning and try to slaughter me on some mountaintop.

My Grade 3 Hebrew teacher was a nice old woman, a holocaust surviver, named Gita Krohn. She was not religious/Shomer Shabbat... She davened at the big C shul in the city. But her Hebrew was decent so they let her teach.

We learned about the Akeidah in Chumash class. Our teacher had a display of the Akeidah, done with Playmobile, at the back of the classroom.

And I remember one day in class, Geveret Krohn went around the classroom and asked us 9-year-olds -- if God had asked us to sacrifice our sons, would we obey or disobey?

People said different things. When it came to my turn, I had given it a lot of thought and answered "While I wish I'd have the belief, dedication, courage etc. to do whatever God told me to do, I suspect that in reality I'd probably love my son so much that I just wouldn't be able to go through with it."

A few kids later, it was my best friend's turn to answer. And he said, "Of course if God told me to do it, I'd listen". I was very close with this friend. His family was not religious, he took some interest in Judaism perhaps mainly due to our friendship and his trying to imitate my observance, but basically he wasn't really Shomer Shabbat.

I remember feeling so sad and ashamed, that that friend was able to answer "yes", while I, the religious kid, wasn't strong enough in my faith to do so!

ונתנה תוקף

2007-09-04T17:20:14Z

I read this on Hebrew wikipedia ( http://he.wikipedia.org/wiki/%D7%95%D7%A0%D7%AA%D7%A0%D7%94_%D7%AA%D7%95%D7%A7%D7%A3 ):

"ונתנה תוקף" גם נתן השראה לשיר מפורסם של לאונרד כהן:"מי באש" (לפירוט). הזמר אלטון ג'ון תרגם את השיר ויצר גרסה שלו הדומה מאוד במנגינתה למנגינה המסורתית הנהוגה בבתי הכנסת.

Translation: "Unetaneh Tokef" also gave inspiration to the famous song of Leonard Cohen: "Who by fire". The singer Elton John translated the poem and created his own version whose tune is very similar to the traditional tune customary in synagogues."

Leonard Cohen's song "Who by fire" can be heard on radioblogclub.

But I'm curious about Elton John's version. The wikipedia article doesn't say what the song's called. Is there anyone out there familiar with Elton John who knows what they're talking about, and can give me the song's title so I can look for it and listen?

Thanks.

עת שערי רצון

2007-09-03T22:31:10Z

A beautiful Sephardic piyut for Rosh Hashanah, that I love:
(Translated from the Hebrew by me. Sorry, my English sucks.)

At the Time of the Gates of Mercy
R’ Judah b. Samuel Abas
Fez – Chaleb (Syria), 12th Century

At the time when the gates of mercy are opening,
On the day when I will spread out my hands to God,
Please remember for me on judgment day,
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

At the end he was tested, at the end of the ten,
The son who was born to you by Sarah,
If your soul is very much tied to him,
Arise and offer him to me as a perfect offering,
On a mountain upon which glory is shining for you,
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

He said to Sarah, “Your dear one Isaac,
Grew but hasn’t yet learned service of heaven,
I will go and teach him that which God ruled”,
She said, “Go, master, but don’t go too far,”
He responded to her, “May your heart trust in God”,
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

Morning came and he got up to go, in the morning,
Along with his two servants, from the realms of lies,
On the third day they reached their destination,
And he saw an image of glory, splendor and preciousness,
He stood and looked at it, to lift himself up,
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

His servants knew, for he called to them, saying,
“Did you see light shining at the top of the mountain of myrrh?
[=Moriah]”
And they said, “We didn’t see anything except a pit,”
He responded, “Sit here, nation compared to a donkey,
And lad and I will continue on to prostrate ourselves,”
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

The two of them went to do the service,
And Isaac answered his father as follows,
“My father, behold the fire and the wood for the pile,
But where, my master, is the lawful lamb,
Are you, on this day, forgetting the laws?”
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

And his father responded, taking shelter in the living God,
That He is the One who will see the lamb for the offering,
“Know, that all that God wishes, He shall do,
Let us build, my son, today, before Him, a throne,
And then He will raise up the sacrifice and the sacrificer,”
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

They banged on the gates of mercy, for them to open,
The son is to be slaughtered, and the father will sacrifice?!
They hope to God, and trust in His mercy,
‘And those who trust in the Lord shall renew strength,’
They wished to attach themselves to the inheritance of God,
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

He prepared the wood of the offering, with strength and valor,
And bound Isaac in the way he would bind a ram,
The day was bright, but in their eyes it was night,
And the multitudes of his tears were flowing with valor,
The eye was crying bitterly, but the heart was joyous,
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

“Tell my mother that her joy has ended,
The son who she bore at ninety years old,
has become the meal of fire and a knife,
Where shall I find her a comforter? Where?
I am pained for the mother who will cry and weep,”
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

“My neck will fear the knife,
Please sharpen it my father, and tighten my bonds,
And when the fire is consuming my flesh,
Take what remains from my ashes,
And say to Sarah, ‘This is the fragrance that Isaac has become’.”
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

All the angels of the chariot moaned,
The Ophan and the Saraph asked for compassion,
Begging God for the minister of the hosts,
“Please grant redemption, and give ransom,
May the world not be without a moon,”
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

The Master of heaven said to Abraham
“Do not send your hand to a third of the lights,
Return in peace, Oh angels of camps,
This day will be a merit for the children of Jerusalem,
On it I open the gates of mercy,”
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

Your covenant, He who dwells in the temple, and [your] oath,
Remember for the people who are stormy and afflicted,
And hear the teki`ah of the one blasting, and the teru`ah,
And tell Zion, ‘The time of redemption has come,
Yinon and Elijah I am sending.’
The binder and the bound, and the altar.

עת שערי רצון
ר' יהודה בן שמואל עבאס
פאס - חלב מאה 12

עֵת שַׁעֲרֵי רָצוֹן לְהִפָּתֵחַ
יוֹם אֶהְיֶה כַפַּי לְאֵל שׁוֹטֵחַ
אָנָּא זְכֹר נָא לִי בְּיוֹם הוֹכֵחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

בָּאַחֲרִית נֻסָּה בְּסוֹף הַעְשָׂרָה
הַבֵּן אֲשֶׁר נוֹלַד לְךָ מִשָּׂרָה
אִם נַפְשְׁךָ בוֹ עַד מְאֹד נִקְשָׁרָה
קוּם הַעֲלֵהוּ לִי לְעוֹלָה בָרָה
עַל הַר אֲשֶׁר כָּבוֹד לְךָ זוֹרֵחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

אָמַר לְשָׂרָה כִּי חֲמוּדֵךְ יִצְחָק
גָּדַל וְלֹא לָמַד עֲבוֹדַת שַׁחַק
אֵלֵךְ וְאוֹרֵהוּ אֲשֶׁר לוֹ אֵל חָק
אָמְרָה לְכָה אָדוֹן אֲבָל אַל תִּרְחַק
עָנָהּ יְהִי לִבֵּךְ בְּאֵל בּוֹטֵח
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

שָׁחַר וְהִשְׁכִּים לַהֲלֹךְ בַּבֹּקֶר
וּשְׁנֵי נְעָרָיו מִמְּתֵי הַשֶּׁקֶר
יוֹם הַשְּׁלִישִׁי נָגְעוּ אֶל חֵקֶר
וַיַּרְא דְּמוּת כָּבוֹד וְהוֹד וָיֶקֶר
עָמַד וְהִתְבּוֹנָן לְהִמָּשֵׁחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

יָדְעוּ נְעָרָיו כִּי קְרָאָם לֵאמֹר
אוֹר הַרְאִיתֶם צָץ בְּרֹאשׁ הַר הַמֹּר
וַיֹּאמְרוּ לֹא נֶחֱזֶה רַק מַהְמוֹר
עָנָה שְׁבוּ פֹה עַם מְשׁוּלִים לַחֲמוֹר
וַאֲנִי וְהַנַּעַר לְהִשְׁתַּטֵּחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

הָלְכוּ שְׁנֵיהֶם לַעֲשׂוֹת בִּמְלָאכָה
וְיַעֲנֶה יִצְחָק לְאָבִיו כָּכָה
אָבִי רְאֵה אֵשׁ וַעֲצֵי מַעֲרָכָה
אַיֵּה אֲדֹנִי שֶׂה אֲשֶׁר כַּהֲלָכָה
הַאַתְּ בְּיוֹם זֶה דָּתְךָ שׁוֹכֵחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

וְיַעֲנֶה אָבִיו בְּאֵל חַי מַחְסֶה
כִּי הוּא אֲשֶׁר יִרְאֶה לְעוֹלָה הַשֶּׂה
דַּע כָּל אֲשֶׁר יַחְפֹּץ אֱלֹהִים יַעֲשֶׂה
נִבְנֶה בְנִי הַיּוֹם לְפָנָיו כִּסֵּא
אָז יַאֲמִיר זֶבַח וְהַזּוֹבֵחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

דָּפְקוּ בְּשַׁעְרֵי רַחֲמִים לִפְתֹּחַ
הַבֵּן לְהִזָּבַח וְאָב לִזְבֹּחַ
קֹוִים לָאֵל וּבְרַחֲמָיו לִבְטֹחַ
וְקֹוֵי יְיָ יַחֲלִיפוּ כֹחַ
דָּרְשׁוּ בְּנַחְלַת אֵל לְהִסְתַּפֵּחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

הֵכִין עֲצֵי עוֹלָה בְּאוֹן וָחַיִל
וַיַּעֲקֹד יִצְחָק כְּעָקְדוֹ אַיִל
וַיְהִי מְאוֹר יוֹמָם בְּעֵינָם לַיִל
וַהֲמוֹן דְּמָעָיו נוֹזְלִים בְּחַיִל
עַיִן בְּמַר בּוֹכָה וְלֵב שָׂמֵחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

שִׂיחוּ לְאִמִּי כִּי שְׂשׂוֹנָהּ פָּנָה
הַבֵּן אֲשֶׁר יָלְדָה לְתִשְׁעִים שָׁנָה
הָיָה לְאֵשׁ וּלְמַאֲכֶלֶת מָנָה
אָנָה אֲבַקֵּשׁ לָהּ מְנַחֵם אָנָה
צַר לִי לְאֵם תִּבְכֶּה וְתִתְיַפֵּחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

מִמַּאֲכֶלֶת יֶהֱמֶה מִדְבָּרִי
נָא חַדְּדָהּ אָבִי וְאֶת מַאְסָרִי
חַזֵּק וְעֵת יְקַד יְקוֹד בִּבְשָׂרִי
קַח עִמְּךָ הַנִּשְׁאָר מֵאֲפְרִי
וְאְמֹר לְשָׂרָה זֶה לְיִצְחָק רֵיחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

וְיֶהֱמוּ כָּל מַלְאֲכֵי מֶרְכָּבָה
אוֹפַן וְשָׂרָף שׁוֹאֲלִים בִּנְדָבָה
מִתְחַנְּנִים לָאֵל בְּעַד שַׂר צָבָא
אָנָּא תְּנָה פִדְיוֹם וְכֹפֶר הָבָה
אַל נָא יְהִי עוֹלָם בְּלִי יָרֵחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

אָמַר לְאַבְרָהָם אֲדוֹן שָׁמַיִם
אַל תִּשְׁלְחָה יָד אֶל שְׁלִישׁ אוּרַיִם
שׁוּבוּ לְשָׁלוֹם מַלְאֲכֵי מַחְנַיִם
יוֹם זֶה זְכוּת לִבְנֵי יְרוּשָׁלַיִם
בּוֹ שַׁעֲרֵי רַחֲמִים אֲנִי פּוֹתֵחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

לִבְרִיתְךָ שׁוֹכֵן זְבוּל וּשְׁבֻעָה
זָכְרָה לְעֵדָה סוֹעֲרָה וּנְגוּעָה
וּשְׁמַע תְּקִיעָה תּוֹקְעָה וּתְרוּעָה
וֶאֱמֹר לְצִיּוֹן בָּא זְמַן הַיְשׁוּעָה
יִנּוֹן וְאֵלִיָּה אֲנִי שׁוֹלֵחַ
עוֹקֵד וְהַנֶּעְקָד וְהַמִּזְבֵּחַ

A really weird thing that happened on Shabbat

2007-09-02T22:25:59Z

So, I was asked to lein (=read the Torah portion) at a certain shul in Jerusalem this Shabbat (Ki Tavo). Yes, the full parashah, for any of you out there used to only reading a third). I was asked on Sunday, a full 6 days before the Shabbat upon which I was supposed to read. I did what I normally do, and prepared most of it on Friday night, the night before. No biggy.

I got to shul, and read fine, didn't make any mistakes. After my reading, the rabbi made this whole big deal about thanking me for reading with so little notice. It was weird. I mean, you can't give someone more than a week to prepare a parsha, because the week before you're preparing the week before's parsha! Yeah, I know I know, not everyone's used to preparing the parsha weekly. I've been doing so since my bar mitzvah, it's easy for me. Nothing to brag about. What's weird though is that shuls should have regular readers who do so every week, so it shouldn't be such a chiddush that they found someone who can read with only a week's notice, right?

Anyway, that's not the weird thing, though.

After reading for their normal minyan, I was asked to go upstairs to read for their "alternative" minyan. It was a minyan designed for Hebrew speakers. Not really my style -- way too much talking by the guy leading it (he gave a sermon between each of the aliyot)! But maybe some people like it.

But the shocking thing was -- when I began reading in the upstairs minyan -- I noticed that some "chochem" had penciled in the vowels into the Sefer Torah (=Torah Scroll)! Not on every word, just the ones he found "difficult" -- so like every 3rd or 4th word! Yikes! I was shocked and appalled!

When I told the rabbi about it, he was shocked too, and said that that scroll doesn't belong to his shul, but to the building next door. Still, he said he'd tell them about it.

For those interested: The (uncontested!) halakhah that you can't have vowels in a Sefer Torah is in the Shulchan Arukh, Yoreh Deah siman 274 at the end. According to the Shulchan Arukh, even after the vowels were erased the scroll still remains passul -- unfit for use. But R' Akiva Eiger, there, says that if the vowels were added after the scroll was written, he thinks it's ok to erase them and then the scroll becomes kosher again. Which I assume was the case here. But as long as the vowels remain inside, even in just one word or one letter, the whole scroll is passul, and needs to be replaced even mid-reading!

Ki Tavo was FULL of words with vowels. True, it's somewhat of a difficult parashah, but who's to say that other parashot weren't done like that as well? To make that scroll usable again someone would need to go through the whole thing from start to finish.

How could someone be so stupid to do that?

Looking for Volunteers for a great Mitzvah on the Yamim Noraim

2007-08-28T18:22:21Z

Hi everyone,

I've been asked to go to lead Rosh Hashanah & Yom Kippur services at "Kibbutz Beror Chayil" (קיבוץ ברור חייל) -- in the northern Negev (near Sderot). This is a secular kibbutz made up mostly of ex-south-americans (from brazil mostly). They're not religious, but they have an affinity for tradition.

I am looking for some volunteers to come with me, help out, and create a nice atmosphere for the people. Food, sleeping arrangements and transportation is on them. It would be a great big mitzvah to do so.

Anyone interested in hearing more about this, please contact me ASAP!

Thanks, and Tizku lemitzvot,

Hillel.

Mister Rogers and Mr. McFeely

2007-07-28T19:43:55Z